138.6 Soccer tournaments, Yeah almost done!

I am getting ready to freeze zucchini for Pizza crusts made from this recipe.

Tonight's Soccer Tournaments dished out a raging cool competition and Mc's team WON again that's two years in a row now for him.

Lunch: Hamburger, wasa crust with onions sauteed in coconut oil and a grapefruit.

Dinner: A small handful of pretzels at my sis house, cheater she said. I didn't eat my crackers at home. In the door to Sauteed Fish, inhale it and run out the door to the soccer tournament. Later in the car I ate a cucumber and my apple.

I can't believe it the hubby did not help me tonight he got ice cream to celebrate the win for Mc and then said "oh just one little bit wont hurt the scale in the morning". He does not understand the way HHCG will just take that and burn it instead of the other fat within my stored system. I am staying far away from the whole kitchen party that is going on in there because its not just ice cream there is Reese's pieces and Butterfingers and malt being added to the whole mix with Carmel and I hope my children go to bed tonight.

Jer is thinking that all this bus riding is just so the cool these days, that with school and playing at the cousins house everyday is helping him to not miss, his kids, as he calls them.

139.4 Who do you cry to???

It was a very rough evening last night. After climbing off the bus I started to get an ear ache. My tummy felt like an old grumbler. I quickly ate my allotted foods of fish cooked in coconut oil and little grape tomatoes a handful. Snarfed down my apple. Went over the allotted amount of melba rounds. Ate a few more almonds. Finished dinner for the little boys made them come home from tracking a deer with the Hubby. Got everyone to bed ate more almonds and then called my partner. HELP HELP I am going to crash tonight. My head is killing me, I have the worst ear ache, and I want food way bad. She said do not cheat! You already blogged that you wanted to see a new number. She read my blog post to me, "see you want it, skinny tastes better then food right now" and the best saying of all "I CAN DO HARD THINGS"! Then she goes and tells me that she just can't keep going. WAIT WHAT! What am I talking to you for then. She made me feel so good telling me I am the little sister here and you are my big sister and look at you you are way smaller then me keep going your going to be fine even if its too hard for me. I said "so you already quit"? "Yes I have quit everyday this week after lunch but you keep going". HURUMFFF All night my head hurt even after taking something to help stop the pain. But by morning I felt better and I have had the best day ever not one hungry pain at all. When stopping at my Sisters house (partner in HHCG) there on her fridge she has a big goal pic posting with the I can do hard things around the photos of what she wants to look like again. She tells me that she made it through today and she will keep going. What a relief because I really need her to stay as strong as I am trying to stay too.

WILLPOWER I have it, I can make it to my goal, I can.

Lunch: 3.5 oz raw weighed shrimp, cucumber with salt and an apple. Melba toasts on the side.

Dinner: 3.5 oz pre cooked chicken with water and fresh spinach boiled to make a light soup with melba rounds. And orange in hand and out to watch my C boy play a great game of football as the starting linebacker.

139.2 Finally a new number.

Sorry I missed a few days in there that I can't get back it ended up being way busy and way stressful kind of weekend. At least I kept up with the diet well sorta. On Sunday night pretty girl made Jalapeno poppers and talked me into eating them, the first batch about burned our mouths and insides out. The next batch was amazing and I of course gained 2 ounces. So with being extremely strict yesterday I have finally gotten past the 140000000s to stay past this time. Yee ha.

Sunday read on scale was 139.8

Monday read was 140.2

Sticking to the diet very tightly since I am nearing the end of 40 days. My bottle of HHCG is almost gone and I want to be farther down the scale then this reading for today.

One thing I have noticed is that the fat pad that sits between you shoulder blades up high on your neck line is gone on my back. There are not to many ways to work that area off and its amazing how my body has moved the fat cells out and it is no longer firm and rounded there. I can actually feel some boniness in that area like it used to be when I was a teenager eons ago. Wow I am amazed at the spots that are shrinking on me right now.

141.0 I want past this number right now!

Tomorrow I want to be at the 140 number instead and then just keep moving down from there. My pants are all hanging again. I have got to buy a belt that will get me through till I can hit the goal point and really have a reason to buy new fancy jeans or pull from my stash that I have stored. I am resisting the desire to run and run in the cool fall air of morning. I promised myself this round I would not exercise to see the difference in how I lose which seems to me about the same as if I do exercise. Slow and steady with lots of back and forth is how it seems to go for me. A person must remember that its not all about the scale that would be why its called Pounds and Inches. There are spots on me that seem thinner and more shapely every day sorta like I had a mini liposuction session if there were such kind of a thing. Of course the skin is baggy where the babies in my life stretched me out but that's how it was after my first and second when I didn't have much weight to lose many years ago. My very skinny mother in law would say it just never goes away once it got stretched out that far. My partner has a cool scales that does your Body Mass index I think I am going to take a day and stand on it to see where I am going in that area, Its been along time since I stood on one of those and measured that area.

141.8 Gut Rock!!!

HHCG and pizza should be highly avoided and not placed together at all. So I slid back to the past weight and didn't really do anything except the Pizza cheat late last night. It goes to show that Dr. Simeons knows what he is talking about when combining to lose and not doing your own fandagling. Thank goodness the weekend is coming I will be home and it will be quiet.

Breakfast: Warm tea of peppermint.
Lunch: Fish with sauteed tomatoes in coconut oil Grissini sticks and half a grapefruit.
Dinner:Wasa crackers with lean beef burger on a grill and an apple. I didn't eat my veggies. My burger seemed huge for a 3.5oz I had preweighed it then froze it and so my memory serves to say it was about the day that my scales broke so I am wondering if it got a bit much on that one because of my broken foodie scales. Well that's it for the day home to finish salsa and clean up from the wild week of running here and there.

Aunt Flo could also be helping to mess this whole losing process also.

140.0 GOT THE JOB wow.

So what was I worried about I know I am good with kids. I am the permanent aide for 3 handicapped children and also a sub bus driver once I do all the training and get my CDL. They kept me with both positions not just the aide. I hate to say it but a lot of the bus drivers are getting older and so they need younger and fresh to keep the buses moving. Maybe eating almonds isn't so bad after all especially if you cheat with a hot dog. Well other then THAT IS A LOT OF FIBER hello bathroom shall I say. This morning my insides where churning and I am glad when the whole body system settled down.

By this evening let me just say I am sooo glad that this was the last day for soccer until Mc plays his tournaments since his team is in top place. We started the long mess with a little girl didn't tell us that she had to get off at her Grandmas so we had to turn the bus around at the end of the route and take her back. I was late to pick all my boys up, we didn't get to eat dinner before leaving, we missed half of the first game for K boy. Thank Goodness Z wasn't late. Then a half hour wait and the Mc boy started his game. The Hubby went with us tonight we got pizza tons of it I was so hungry by 9:30pm I ate it who cares I wasn't ever going to get home to eat my protocol foods. We still had to swing over and watch the last of the C boy play an amazing game of football in the position that he loves where they finally stuck him tonight. Pretty girl moaned she really hates pizza but ate like me out of desperation.
Jer well he ate pizza and half an apple with the skin on. WOW now that is some progress in the eating department for him. It was even pizza that has sauce and pepperonis with cheese and the bread that's 4 types of sensations and textures add the apple and that's a total of 6 with the skin left on. I think school is getting him back into the swing of its ok to eat again. He does head start so that the peer pressure outside of our home will help him to be ok about eating. I know crazy thing to think of using a school setting for but when you have his issues as a parent you will try every angle necessary at your availability.

141.0 Driving to see Jers growth Doctor.

I ate Popcorn with caramel on it because Jer wanted it and I couldn't resist the stuff taunting me.
I ate almonds because the drive made me a nervous wreck and I had to hurry three hours there and back better then biting my lip to a bloody pulp.
I ate a beef hot dog wrapped in a pretzel that Jer wanted and then only ate a few bites off the top.
I ate my lunch of salad with tuna on it because I didn't have anything else that could travel with me and was cooked up. I ate wasa cracker with it.
I ate lots of the raw almonds again. Trying to keep myself from being nervous as the traffic squeezed in to me on the way home. I made it back in time with seconds to spare to my newly required CPR class so that I can continue being a sub aide on the bus. Hopefully this will turn into permanent aide soon.
I ate my one apple and then nothing else because I cheated enough and went outside of protocol and ate because I couldn't waste the stupid beef hot dog. So glad I am home safe tomorrow with my stove near at home and maybe my metabolism has kicked into gear and I won't suffer since you know that's all fiber type foods well not the hot dog but oh well that's what happens when you have to go see a Dr. for you little guy and get home on a time limit.
By the way the amount of Medicine they can give has been reached the top in what his body can handle at the moment. His growth is slow but it has been happening, now if we could just get him to allow himself to consume the calories that he needs outside of his list of will and will not eat.

141.8 Thoughts on a goal & Jer and sensory eating..

Now that I am getting to feel smaller in my size 14 jeans that by the end of the day are falling off me I start to wonder if where I am at in the weight zone is just good enough. Why am I trying to get clear to 120 is it because its a goal I set so long ago and must achieve or is it because there are some jeans that are in my storage stash that are that size and were practically new that I just must someday be able to wear again. I feel like I am looking really good right now that is until I look at a photo of myself and then I think good grief I still look larger then I want to look. But I feel so good that its hard to think I still might have some more to loose to reach what a Wii states would be my optimum weight for my height and age. Well I guess the bottom line is that I set a goal and I need to reach that spot before I really feel complete in this journey besides that 120lbs goal was set years before I ever had a Wii or knew anything about how to make HHCG work to help me loose weight. Better make it to my goal so I know that I have completed it.

So I interviewed today and now I wait to see if I pass into the life of being a bus aide and future substitute bus driver which at some point will push into the career of a permanent bus driver when my little guy heads off to kindergarten but that will be a few years down the road.
Jer and I met with another feeding specialist and did a whole workup on what he will eat and things that affect him in his environment. He was red flagged for sensory eating disorders and now we will watch to see what he will verses what we can get him to eat. The discovery of only eating white and brown foods with a tiny bit of blue for dried blueberries and once in a great while an orange carrot is a big insight from this summer. There really isn't anything that is a new trick to be given to my bag of stuff to help him out but at least it gets his Dr's. attention and all of the schools have to make sure we work to keep him fed as the years pass on. All kids have some of these little issues its just rough when they have them so strong that it keeps a kid from eating at all on some days. It also helps a Mom to know that she isn't crazy when her kids will not eat like some of her other children will. Eating its such a big control factor for children they must get to have some bossiness over at least some areas of their life as long as they stay safe and eat something.
Gearing for a drive to the big city tommarow.

142.6 WILD and Thankful

This day was wild. From our close burning wild fire that has now been bumped to a three helicopters flying over our house all day long to a fire that almost took our a friends out on the other end of the state of Utah. My kids are starting to get nervous we are getting our own evacuation plan set in gear so we have a plan. This is what my kids look at everyday now to see what the update is getting to be.
I got asked to do an early morning bus run because someone was sick. Jer and I left at 6:15am and rode with the kids who I ride in the afternoon with except for a very beautiful little girl who only rides in the morning was my partner for the ride. She is the same age as my far away son. Her struggles have made many a Dr. that worked on my son years later smarter over the years and know what can be done different and what kind of strength human life has. Where once she was wheel chair bound now she is not. Where once she did not eat by mouth now she can with a small amount. There are limitations like talking but its amazing how resilient she is, I was honored to hold her hand and help her off the bus and then hand the handle to her on her backpack as she went off to learn a bit more where no one thought she would ever advance and learn anything at all. Human life is amazing especially when given the chance to grow and expand. Thank you Melissa for being handicapped and willing to come teach us all how to work with a body that came out into the world to early and had many a struggle to live. Thank you for being willing to help medicine advance at the cost of your physical body so that they knew a bit more what to do and not do for my own son many years later at his birth.
Lunch:Cabbage chicken soup with apple and grissini sticks
Dinner:Fish with spinach sauteed in coconut oil and wasa crumbled over it. Strawberries just a small handful.

143.2 Schooching slowly.

So now the scale wants to hold to the lovely steak day from two days ago. That much steak is not a legal when on HHCG unless the oz count would have been 3.5 and it most definitely was not I am still holding to the 143 read. Pickles going to make them literally this morning and then relax all day because its been a very long week. Hubby and I tried to drive up to see how far down the mountain range the wild fire has burned and this day they have shut the freeway entrances off during the middle of the day. Its is extremely smoky but at least today the wind is blowing it up and away from us.

Breakfast: warm tea I was freezing all morning.
Lunch: tolapia with yellow pear tomatoes and grissini sticks and strawberry's in a tiny bit of milk made into a smoothie.
Dinner:Asparagus and turkey breast ground and fried on the grill. Wasa crackers to make a bun and then a yummy cold orange.

143.4 See I told you so but I am making it.

Not bad but ya the scale went up. We had a lovely dinner at Steve's Steak house. I only had steak ends, 6oz worth and I couldn't tell where to cut it down to where 3oz would be but its ok for one night right. My partner in HHCG my little sis is back working to get off the rest of her pounds now. Its nice to have a buddy to share the rough physiological moments with, like your not hungry but you just want to eat it days. Long day of cabin cleaning and making beds but its going for a very good cause so it makes the work light. I am going to remind myself I am working hard to get on down the scale to finish my goal off reaching to 120lbs. I am making it I am.

142.6 22 years and counting

This wonderful day that I wed him. Many an up and several very rocky down in the bottoms where we dragged each other along have passed. 7 cute kids later that helped me gain 70lbs over from what he met me at. Built a house survived it. Faced financial cost of some 2.8 million dollar baby and more money to dish out for the rest of his life, we have made it to this momentous anniversary. He is taking me to dinner in my skinny jeans size 5/6 and my reward tank top that I have looked at every day when I get on the scales I still have a bit more to really hit my goal but I made it quite far so far. Later the scale will be higher I am sure because he will want steak or prime rib and the works with it, but at least he wont want desert so I am saved. Then a movie and a night time drive to look over the lights where he kissed me the first time like he really meant it and then forever took place because several weeks later he asked me to be his friend forever and ever. I sure love him!

142.6 Singing a smoky song.

Ignore the time stamp on my camera the boys have altered it, the picture was taken Tue and its still looking like this. This is how we are breathing, lovely right! There was a tiny rise because of the birthday Z boys frozen cake. He cut it and said here Mom this one is special just for you. Oh boy that sang trouble I ate it and now pay it but one slice at least didn't do me in. Breakfast:Mint herbal tea with chocolate stevia to sweeten.


Lunch:Cumber salad with Strawberry vinagrette and tiny onions and grissine sticks. Grilled turkey breast of 3.5 oz.
Dinner:Chicken choped tomatoes and and apple with some wasa crackers.
Riding the bus was a bit explosive I had to defuse a fued that I guess is on going with some kids. At least it didn't blow while they were on the bus. I got an interview and the Bus driver said he hopes that they just give me the job because its making his ride alot easier. Next Tue. good vibes send my way please.

Inspired by YOU!

Angie inspires because she has a baby and is young and keeps working to lose.

Lynn because she has won and keeps winning and that's just inspiring!

Helen taught me a few running tips that I used without having to look dumb as a new runner.

Mrs.Fatass she has cool topics and she is cute with her smiling face.

Skinny Mini well she really knows how to move and I can not stop paying attention to her scale reading it drives me since she uses HCG just like me in a different way and my goal is the same as hers.
Oh Yeah I love this one too. Soymamiymas ,and LUCY because she has that and its just too cool to help you find more in your same groove.
Yep Inspired every day by others who do not blog and that includes the amazing
Journeybeyondsurvival because she just keeps on plugging on in the face of so so much. And yes girl I broke your rule because you are an amazing writer as I see it the trestles are getting put back in shape and who doesn't have a few broken rails in their lives it just makes us better people.

142.2 I am ashamed I had a bad attitude.

The day started out with a blessing beyond belief. Wally world had all kinds of things being clearanced for half of the half off price. 200$ later everyone had new sheets, at least three shorts each, 4 new shirts, two window fans that earlier this year I had paid 30$ for but got for 10$ today. Every possible tie color you could imagine for 2.50$ plus zipper kind the boys were thrilled to get them and now I can replace my far away boys ties since he gave them all away as he has helped people on a new adventure in life in the far away land of Johannesburg South Africa doing and LDS Mission. Mind you thats like 14 ties that where 2.00 each regular 14.00. Everything I had on my list of start replacing over the next three months with each little bit from the pay check was done in 1 hour. WOW I am blessed especially because I really do not like shopping and that took such a short time to score all that we needed in this household.

The bus subing as aide ride was a blast. Did you know that Wally world has salad that is in just the right amount for when you are doing an HHCG diet protocol. I ate on the run getting to do the bus subbing job.

But later after picking up the C boy from football practise my attitude went sour. He ran into some of the scout group of his that was going on a bike ride up the mountain. He begged please run go get his bike and take him to go on the 15 mile bike ride that will end at dusk. I conceded and then caught up to leaders about half way up the mountain that isn't burning. Here is where my attitude when bad. They wouldn't pull over and add him to their car load and put his bike on the trailer they just kept driving up up up. I hadn't wanted to drive all the way up the mountain when I had to pee and hit a million bumps and wanted to instead feed kids and get to bed early for one night. Alas I didn't smile my usual smile I looked mad and they knew it and now I feel bad for being ornery and not just enjoying the scenery on a non burning mountain that God made in all its fall changing glory. So now I am doing some repenting because heaven forbid I don't want my body to do some crazy thing like hang on to a bit of fat because I have issues like I hear some people saying on those alternative medicine shows that sometimes I flick over if I ever watch TV. So I hope I get forgivin because I really am a blessed person. See here one more reason, the neighbors up the canyon got evacuated because of the smoke late last night, and I really got a shopping blessing. So as C boy said Mom you should have just enjoyed the ride instead. I guess I need to still do some relaxing learning. Yep done ranting now.

143.0 No stall doing what its supposed to do.

Yep I am doing great even with a smoky air around us. Can't remember what I ate it was way to busy a day of cleaning cabins and catching up on bills then racing to the soccer field.

K boy gets to go with his Dad tonight and sleepover for the 3rd grade major field trip of their school year life. They see a tall tale Annie Bangs come to life and really tap on the window of the lodge that they are getting ready to fall asleep in. Fear and suspense sets in to their little minds for the night. But its totally thrilling to them.

We at home get to breath the smoke for the night of a giant camp fire that seems to want to consume our whole mountain range around us and has burned for two months now. Its getting closer and closer uggha. Jer is actually handling it well but I have had to increase the oxygen a tiny bit as he sleeps and he is asking for a breathing treatment every morning and night now.

Jer tried to eat all day long that's a switch maybe we are finally getting some kind of a growth spurt coming on. Yippee.

144.6 Lets just pick a topic.

OOOOOOH I see a hold or an increase in the scale not happy this morning. Going to be eating the leanest of the lean in my protocol agenda to make sure I keep moving down.

Breakfast: 10 HHCG drops under my tongue later on Chocolate Stevia Water 1 liter down.

Lunch: Lean Turkey breat grilled, over sliced tomaotes out of my own garden and bread croumbs from Grissini sticks. And oh Yah HHCG 10 drops under my tongue. 2 liters down of my water total. I ate my orange after riding the bus with all the kids.

Dinner: Grilled chicken, Strawberry vinagrette over green salad leaves from out of my garden topped with Melba toasts.

Which topic are the funest in your book? Kids stories

Farm stories

Old time stories

Action stories

Mystery stories

Drama stories

Weight loss stories

Real life stories

hmm how about a bed time stories. Good night all I think I am too tired to keep thinking up topics.

144.0 100 Grams is 3.5 ounzes.

No loss no gain, better then I expected.

Reviewing the diet helped me see something I had missed and didn't realize. I promise this protocol needs to be read every time you do a round. I ate Tuna at the start and it has to much fat in it. Dang and I thought it was a good meat for on the go meals you know the kind that is packed in water and the albacore white stuff but maybe I better stay a way unless it is so so a necessity for on the road Dr. visits.

I have to hide that sweet plant in my bathroom warm window, I caught the C boy and Mc boy snitching leaves off to taste. I told them if we really wanted a bush they better leave it alone. Ya no good warm barn window to stick it in dang.

Sunday take a snooze day and then letter writing day to faraway boy.

Lunch: Chicken 3.5 oz worth mixed with salad. Made homemade strawberry vinaigrette. Topped off with grissini sticks.

Dinner: Fish 3.5 oz sauteed with coconut oil, Cucumbers with salt and melba toast. One apple it keeps the Dr. away supposedly.

144,0 My own Stevia plant.

I had one of those physiological slides. See the scale didn't hurt me from my infractions yesterday so I kept feeling like I would be just fine and dandy. That was a nice sized weight drop.

BUT!!

I didn't feel hungry all day but I kept wanting the stuff you shouldn't have when losing with HHCG. It started with making french toast for the kids all at home. A grinding pull to taste it because it was there and I wanted. I did resist the whole one and went for tiny bites that Jer tried to feed me out of his. It had lots of cinnamon sugar on it since he thought it was toast and I disguised it under the guise of cinnamon toast. Then a very very late lunch at 3:00 because of swathing and hauling hay with the hubby. Dinner late again. and dang tempting swiss cheese. I caved I hope its not as bad on the scale rise as it might be say I was eating sugar. I wasn't even hungry I just wanted it outside of the 500 cal limit that you are supposed to stay on to drop the excess weight. This round is harder on the psyche. I know the protocol works so why do I keep messing with the temptations?

On a lighter note my Dad is the bestest. I had know idea he and my Mom where attempting to grow their own Stevia plants. They started several months ago and then brought a pretty plant to all of their kids. Its like a mint leaf without the minty taste just a very very sweet taste when you bite down into it. I was so excited now I will always have my own no calorie sweetener if I dry the leaves and grind them up into a powder. Now if only the little plant will grow big into a bushy bush. Problem is it can't ever get cold and that is going to be tough to keep from happening in the cold land of Utah.

Breakfast: Bites of cinnamon toast which was really french toast under the covering.

Lunch: Beef burger, Cherries bell tomatoes most likely more then I should have eaten. Orange and grissini sticks.

Dinner: Talopia fish, apple, and I can't remember what my veggie was we had so many kinds in the kitchen from picking most everything out of the garden because it froze last night. To many melba toast and the dang cheat of to much Swiss cheese.

146.0 A chant that runs in my head 120.

I have been chanting everyday now to myself 120 120 120 120 120 120 120 120.

Get the picture.

Its a chant that I started many years ago when I wanted to reset my thermostat burn level. But alas another baby interrupted the chant and it took awhile to get back to it.

It was even written on a card siting in my mirror all those many years with a pic of my return to the skinny year after 3 births and 2 miscarriages.

When I started this lose journey back in February I looked at that card and pic and knew I would get there some day.

This next few months is it I am going to get there.

Even if I have to chant it when the boys beg for brownies and the brownies rise up out of the package and cry to me to eat them.

I will conquer so here goes 120 120 120 120 120 120 120 120 120 120 120 120 120 120 120 120 120 120.

Breakfast: Chocolate water, dang a spoon of Jer's wild brown rices.

Lunch: Talapia fish and cherry bell tomato's, an apple out the door to work and dang two crackers that Jer fed me that had peanut butter in the middle.

Dinner: Steak round rib eye, 2.5 ounce amount weighed raw, cucumbers with salt, dang a bite of that horrible begging brownie, never taking C boy shopping with me again he murders the diet with his treat begging. Didn't dare eat the orange with that many little calorie infractions leveled for this day. I just got to keep saying my goal that's it 120 120 120 120 120 120 120 120 120 120 120 120.

147.6 Puny loss and Tomato Sauce!

Its a tomato sauce day the air is filled with canning smells in my kitchen. See my bounty from my garden. For as rainy as this year has been I have lots of tomatoes and cucumbers so chili sauce spaghetti sauce and pickles are in the jars.

Breakfast: Dark Chocolate Stevia in my 3 liters of water.

Lunch: Lean turkey breast with cucumbers salad, gissini sticks and tiny onions. A nice red apple to crunch.

SHOCK and BLESSED I got called to be a bus aide for a handicapped child. It pays the amount we needed to keep far away boys assigned payment amount to stay on his LDS MISSION. Plus they gave me a car to drive to and from the connection point so I never have to pay that out of my pocket. I arrive home 15 min after all the other kids and it is such a perfect system because little guy can go to my sis house for the two hours and play play play with his little cousin.

How blessed can we get. The job could last all year that's a blessing for sure.

Dinner: Salad on the go to soccer with lettuce out of my own garden sliced strawberries and melba toasts on top.

What an evening, Pretty girls very good guy friend broke his leg in a football pile up. 2 Little boys both lost their soccer game and Mc"s team in soccer is undefeated. C boys freshman team lost really badly they all looked beat down tonight except for Mc and the chores still had to been done at 10:30pm late and tired is how they all went to bed.

148.0 Never give up even when there is no loss.

Look at this Never Give Up!

I have been inspired yet again and it just goes to show that there is always something to get you going if you will let it in your heart. Truly amazing and inspiring.

Breakfast lemon Chamomile tea with the other half of the grapefruit.

The dentist gets to see all the kids today but two. C boy doing football gets off and there is nothing we can do to get the faraway boy here to see the dentist. Pretty girl J is not thrilled her mouth is tiny and it hurts her she says. The boys think the prizes are so cool. Me I don't want to drive to town again and we have to go again tomorrow three days in a week is very tiring.

Lunch: Tilapia fish with tiny onions in a soup broth maybe some celery too.

Dinner: Grilled beef hamburger, tomatoes slices and melba rounds on top. I forgot my fruit allotment.

The boys tonight didn't even have to be told to get all the soccer gear put in the main bag it was siting there ready to go. C boy shock washed his own football pads. Mc helped K boy do his spelling words and K was willing no foot dragging. Pretty girl got a ride home from Tech practise all by herself without me telling her to try before going at 9pm to get her. Do I sense a maturing in the air maybe a growing up a bit. It was the most peaceful night at our house that there has ever been on a school evening.

I made a job application to the school district send me good vibes I need a better closer job then ungrateful managers who want to fire you over there most likely own illegal drug paraphernalia that they accused me of stealing.

I think I will have to try this when I get done losing my 25 pounds.

148.6 Hey its not Monday! Get GOING.

A new day to work with called Tuesday.

Breakfast: Mint tea on the run and a half a grapefruit.

Worked my butt off. I have really tight leg muscles all the way up and down and in my hip and buttock area. I haven't been running to make that happen and the only thing I have done is to make 23 beds on one day, bending stretching and strange movements that may have made some pulled leg muscles I guess.

Lunch was a wrap of spinach with chicken inside and melba toasts.

I think Wendy's salad dressing my not be at all good for you when your on HHCG. I got stuck after work with all the appointments to have hair cuts for all the boys (that's 4 cuts) that are tired of being called girls and soccer games that spread from 5:oo to 8:00 that's what happens when 3 boys play the game (by the way all 3 won, celebration excuse for burgers out the Dad said). So anyway dinner didn't come very fast and we stoped to fill the empty tummy's as we left town. I got the apple salad and put a bit of the dressing on my salad. My logic was it was vinaigrette but I am pretty sure the sugar that they add got me so no loss the next day will most likely be my punishment.

Glory be I won a prize from here besides she has won the weight loss game but still keeps posting on she is inspiring.

It's been a hard days work, good night all.

150.2 P2 R3 Day 4 Clothing commissary.

My one lovely meal yesterday was all out of my garden because I still have lots of lovely lettuce varieties growing. I made a salad and put orange pieces with tuna fish and my melba crackers all together It was yum.

I am dropping again yee ha. Mixed thoughts about it though because then what will I wear. My clothing selection is getting small since everything feels very lose out of my closet. What a funny predicament. I wanted to lose because I couldn't afford to keep buying bigger new clothing and now I am getting small and faced with the same problem. Yep like I said goofy predicament to be in.

After work today I felt like I had been trampled on it was a tough day of cleaning and running back and forth. I ate on the job which was only a cucumber, bread stick and an apple. I had to cook my turkey in one of the cabins I cleaned, crazy because I thought it was precooked chicken until I unwrapped it.

Dinner: apricot smoked hamburger, tomato, orange and melba toast. Being busy sure helps keep your mind off the food if your a board eater.

154.0 top load weight for my last round.

So that was not to much of an increase even though I drank cream after dinner with sugar mixed in it.

Today is going to be a bit different for the first day of P2 protocol for me. In my church on the first Sunday of the month we fast and give to those who have less the monies we would have spent on food. Also when we have really important causes or needs we concentrate on the fast in a way that the Lord will know we are in great need and if it is his will then there will come a result in his time and if we do our faith filled part to help the result the need will happen to be helped. So that's today and I am fasting that my brother be able to find a job too and of course its my first protocol day so I am going to be missing the first two meals for the day which means I will only have one meal today of 500 cals. The scale should be interesting tomorrow can't wait to see if I drop all the loading plus the extra gains from last week pizza soccer meal.

Never had a hungry moment today either. Saying good bye to extra fat cells that are not needed anybody want them?

153.4 OOHH Loading result.on day 2.

Wow I can't believe how your body just sucks up the calories. and hangs on when your eating really high fat with HCG.

I had to work so I just got cream in the breakfast and then headed off lunch was an omelet with lots of cheese and tons of butter and a very fat steak.

I cant stuff anything else I just have no more room to do it. Things have shrunk in my insides I guess cause I just can't eat as much as I used to. Oh I ate lots of almonds with chocolate and that's the last I can stuff in

I didn't have a headache at all this time and no body shakes like the very first time that I took HHCG. Feeling great and ready to see the loss start happening.

150.0 Started my 3rd round with HHCG. Lunch with JBS!!

Lunch with the amazing JBS and her pretty Chickadees, FABULOUS but to dang short. This month please lets win the money for her cause so that there can be some kinda of find to solve this terrible disease. That has got to be the prettiest little girl ever and she deserves to have a fighting chance at life like us. Even if it might mean a life trying to lose weight or struggling to understand math or talking to your crush for the first time. I know that the vote was so close I watched it bounce up to one and an hour later drop to 2 so that the winner didn't end up for her. So now that we have one more month lets get it done this time and win. Did you know that you can vote off your facebook and your email and text it in. That's three votes for one person. Then if your like me I made my oldest kids help me out, our house could vote 15 times that's a lot of votes, so help out please.

Loading day while on the road to see Jer's lung doctor, Yeah three steroids were taken out of his daily medicine requirement. Maybe it will also help me not have to breath them in while giving them to him. Dang we still have to keep the oxygen, our elevation is to high and he would struggle to much at night while he sleeps if we take it away.

Foods for my loading:

Yummy salad with JBS at Whole foods. I decided to just eat like normal but add a few things like cream to breakfast cereal. Dinner was salmon with tons of sauce and potatoes mashed with gravy and pie that was creamy and lots of chocolate almonds. I do not like feeling sick from eating and I figure the pizza is still sitting in my gut making me feel a bit yuck from the day before. Late that night I again drank some cream with sugar it better be enough good fats cause its all I can hack.

149.9 Soccer Pizza and starting HHCG my 3rd time around.

GRRRRR. Soccer nights are kicking my butt and making the scale go up up up. We were all starving and so it was pizza for dinner. The whole night I felt like a pound weight was stuck in my gut and the stomach rolled and rumbled. In the middle of the night when I awoke to check Jer's oxygen I felt so yucky that I will never eat bread pizza again or at least not from that joint.

I made one of those executive choices and I am starting my Phase 2 Round 3 with Homeopathic HCG in the morning. I have been fighting the scales way to much this last week so it is just best to get dropping and feeling in control with the scale and losing that last now 30 or so pounds since I have slid up the scales a bit over the last week or so.

Driving for three hours isn't that fun for the need to eat loads of good fat but I have done it once and the hospital cafeteria has lots of cream pie and milk shakes work too.

I am having lunch with a wonderful person be jealous, cause I can't wait.

148.8 Eats

My C boy came home from scout camp and taught all my other younger boys how to eat

ANT BUTTS

yep that's what I said. They tell me they are full of protein, help keep you full and taste like lemon pepper. The up side you have lots of energy from them and you do not go to sleep very easy after making them your evening meal. Thanks to a cousin who was a counselor at the camp they will now survive if lost in the wilderness.

BUT

Mom has new ruling no eating ANT BUTTS in the evening on a school night.

Breakfast protein shake with cream cheese, milk, strawberries and stevia for sweetness.

Lunch.

Gearing to go see Jer's lung Dr. maybe we can get rid of some medicine or maybe he can sleep without oxygen at night here's hoping.